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Zerg Unit's Week: A Recap Wednesday 3rd June - Wildy PKRI vs Rampage, crashed by Terror, followed by F50 vs Astro. I love the Wilderness. The petrified trees. The dark terrain interspersed with stagnant ponds and lava fields. But what I love more is when a clan has the bollocks to fight us in the wilderness, just like Rampage. In a quaint corner of the wilderness not far west of sperm hill 28 Zergs charged from atop a hill of petrified trees to face the 24 Rampagers laying in wait. It was a slaughter. But, knowing Terror were stalking us with 40 capes we made quick work of Rampage before moving South out of their sights. Then they had the audacity to claim a clear. Fake fucking news. I see you, Terror Spokesman. You lie-touting, truth-bending Fox News wannabe. Anyway, we sat on 18 ports with 25 people and Terror ran away. Then we went to clan wars to do some F50s versus Astro. We won both rounds. Do I really need to explain what happens? Just watch the video. Friday June 5th - Zerg Unit vs Astro Saturday, June 6th - Zerg Unit vs The World Fuck me what a day. The wilderness has never seen such carnage. This day will be written into Gielinor legend, up there with the Falador Massacre of 06/06/06. They’re already clearing a space in the dusty Varrock Museum to commemorate this day. Zerg Unit, clad in its iconic Scotland flag cape, clears the combined forces of Terror and Astro -- equaling to about 340 -- in a single charge. Not a single Team-32 Titan was lost in battle. Look, if you want the full story I suggest you go chat to Curator Haig Halen. I gave him a full account. He’s double-checked it, triple-checked it in fact, and he knows it’s true. Not a single inaccuracy. Exhibit releases 07/06/2021. Join our Discord server: https://discord.gg/WqumDxd Idle in our CC: ‘ZergUnit’ Get a team-32 cape.

Last night the boys got the blue check verification as the #1 P2P XLPC. On the Mount Rushmore of XLPC, olympic gold medal on the neck glistening, 5g internet on the computer, GODDDDAM. (Sorry for the flip phone but mans out here on the family plan)

Interested in joining the #1 Zerk/Tank/Med clan? Join Vengeance today at http://tastevengeance.com/forums/ Todays Sunday action featured a long awaited CWA between Veng EST Vs GMT. This fight what everyone where waiting for was the biggest action Vengeance has ever had on the cwa scene. Imagine best action vs your own clan :thinking: it was quite the showdown. GMT taked both rounds on multi spells and EST at single spells! After the long waited fight vs timezones we had a sweet drop party for the members! However as far as Wildy action goes it did not disappoint. The vikings didn't prep for anything today but we smallmanned around pretty much all day getting several clears on teams and smaller group of pkers at every possible location there is. Then a 30minutes fight Vs Bracket Rival Resurgence and Collecting a fat number of +1s. I won't spend to much talking about this one. Just enjoy the media.

Interested in joining the #1 Zerk/Tank/Med clan? Join Vengeance today at http://tastevengeance.com/forums/ Couple of shooters decided it was time to slap some mfers in singles. Turned out to be a very succesfull night (with no anti-veng in sight?). Without any further ado, enjoy the media! Btw, GZ Danny, on your first 1+ on your 4th trip in 2 years time! #veng

Interested in joining the #1 Zerk/Tank/Med clan? Join Vengeance today at http://tastevengeance.com/forums/ Versatility is a cornerstone here at the Viking camp and todays sunday adventures showcased our large array of skills. We started out with a fight Vs VR. We fought them 25 Vikings Vs 27 VR. But fighting down ops is what motivates the battle hardened warriors over at Veng HQ it was a good fight including the laughable crash attempts by AC. After that we had about hour to kill before our next big fight so we sweeped caves and found no contest. We decided to clear the total worlds of their loot since the protection services have become... incompetent. We then geared up 27 Vikings to fight a bracket rival in Resurgence. We fought them for about 40+ minutes of squeaky clean action. The fight was back in forth but a 10minute portion in the middle the Vikings absolutely decimated every pile with expert precision. A very good showing for Veng and another good fight for the med scene. Unfortunately there aren't any other med clans in our scene willing to come fight but another easy day for the vikings. Finally We went out single pking once the GMTers went to bed. We jumped on a few juicy kills and colected staff, couple decent mystics and headed off for the night.

The boys done did it again. Massed up 4 ballbags (peaking at 5), laced on the heelies and skated our way to the rev caves. The boys raided the protected worlds with no protection, catching all types of STDs. Show me the $$$$$$$$ Ya know the vibes #Blitz and bonus clip LMFAO

Today we massed up 44 JUGGERNAUTS later peaking at 57. WE QUICKLY HAD INTEL THAT TERROR HAD ABOUT 60-70 WITH THE SAME SNIPE TEAMS IN THEIR CAPES AND DIDNT HESITATE TO FIGHT THEM DOWN OPTS. DESPITE THEM BEING UP 10-15 THEY STILL SAT IN SINGLES OR LVL 2 LIKE WTF?? YOU OKAY BRO COME RUSH US PUSSIES. SO US BEING THE BIG DICKS THAT WE ARE WE DECIDED TO HIT THEM AND CLEARED THEM TO SINGLES. LATER ON THE TRIP OUR RAT TOLD US THAT THEY WERE AT FALLY WITH A TEAM OF TANKS WAITING FOR US TO HIT. THE WHOLE TIME WE SAT AT CA WAITING FOR THEM TO STOP BEING PUSSIES AND HIT US ONCE AGAIN. THEY FINALLY SHOWED UP AFTER AN HOUR JUST TO WAIT @ LVL 2 THE WHOLE TIME LIKE WTF??? LMFAO UP 15 BTW.. WE SAW THAT THEY HOPPED INTO ZU TO JUST SPAM THEM IN SINGLES WHILE WE WERE AT CA, SO WE DECIDED TO WAIT UNTIL THEY HIT MULTI AND SMACKED THEM ACROSS THE MAP FOR THEM TO END UP IN SINGLES IN .5 ZU LATER DMED US THAT TERROR ARE SUCH PUSSIES AND ENDED THE DAY WITH A NICE FT50. TERROR STOP STARVING UR MEMBERS AND GROW SOME BALLS FUCKING PUSSIES LUHMAO.. Ramie POV Molds POV Pkeru POV

FORUMS | DISCORD | TWITTER Resurgence's Sunday: CWA Mini with Public Enemy & Wildy w/ Veng The day started when Public Enemy reached out to us for a mini no prep CWA. The rules were 55 def cap, multi spells, and max weapons; we gladly accepted as it would be a nice change of pace. We did three quick rounds and took all three. It was really fun and as always, thanks for the action! We look forward to more events in the future, and some more friendly banter Next was our planned 30 minute scrap with Vengeance. Today was a busy day for our surgeons, many of the boys were making bank irl and were unable to attend. Nonetheless, we gathered 20 of our strongest warriors and set out on a fight where would be outnumbered. However, our morale was high and we were prepared to do what it took to win the fight. The fight did not start off well for us, I will admit. Vengeance had the upper hand for the first 10-15 minutes. Fighting down ops was definitely a challenge, however, the boys were able to swing it back to our favor. Through some sick nasty clumps, quick transitions, and some high quality spearing we were able to take control of the last bit of the fight. Yet again, we had some CLEAN ACTION, tyff!! #resgangniggayurrme VIDEO: CWA v. PE VIDEO: WILDY FIGHT w/ VENG PICS/LOOT EXTRA LOOTY

Discord: GxRMsvA | 'Wolves Den' CC During the last few weeks our rivalry with Astronomy has escalated. Astro has repeatedly brought tanks, leaked our discord audio, and leaked sensitive irl information. While all of this was happening, there has been civil strife in Astro. One founder left a few weeks ago; another founder left several days ago; and a leader was booted for scamming a member just recently. All of these events have led to the division of Astro clan. Instead of focusing on Astro's internal issues, it continues to move forward against Terror, a clan it cannot beat. In this juicy preview (second part released soon) Astro Founder, Data, explains why Astrology avoid Terror even if the opts are matched. He goes on to explain how Astro has to coordinate with other clans/teams before mustering the courage to fight Terror. It's ironic because Astro accuses us for doing the same exact thing, but they do it themselves. Hypocrites! Data continues, "It never fucking works out. We always end up getting cleared." Data discusses his dissatisfaction with Astro leader, fs blood and refers to him as "an inexperienced rank that doesn't know what he's doing." Data elaborates on Falcon, the first Astro founder that jumped ship. "Nobody wants to do inners everyday. There is wilderness for a reason. Your clan is going to die if you do not give your members action. Falcon understood that action is more important than winning or losing, ya know. But to blood winning is more important than anything." Data's dissatisfaction is warranted. When Astro first began it gave action no matter the circumstances. They were commendable and respectable. However, that Astro is no more. They have strayed far from their roots, which is arguably the reason why it has lost countless ranks and members alike. It'll be GAME OVER soon enough.

Team Blitz massed up 6 rednecks, even got a dude with ancients (peaked at 7). We never heard of protected worlds until today where this bum ass clan called SOG though they could tell us what to do. We sat at these protect worlds and went craw-bow fishing, killing all craw-bowers left and right. SOG tried to log on levels 70s-90s to rag us but we snatch their snakeskin bandanas. PM #Team_Blitz for real protection YA DIG. THE HAUL (MANS AND HIS FLIP PHONE CAMERA AGAIN LMAO) (and shoutout to our haters this one is for you)

On this fine Saturday the Astronauts of Astro massed up 45 later peeking at 65. We had some intel of all the snipe teams mass joining terror idk why they getting so hyped over a single day pull and got smoked by Astro that was down 20. Hows that big purple dick @ Terror. Thanks for the free 8-0 wins. All I hear on discord is shawn crying all trip on how its terror vs the world get it right its Astro vs the fucking world baby. Nice open CC btw hopefully you guys will get some better intel or not. Btw nice audio leak l0l0l sound broken af. "Idk why zu focusing us they should be focusing the highest pulling clan" l0l0l. You didn't win shit but nice try. Astro #1 taking their dogs with a leash l0l. We brought the energy but did you? Sound a little broken. Astro vs the world! Shawn dont pick up you die in .5 everytime. "We up on cape counter" but you go to singles every time. Good try but thank you for free wins. First its Tanks, now its 1 Snipe in our cape. What is it next? Look at yourself for having 4 snipe teams keep paying em to be in your cape. Awkward Discord. Videos: @Fudog @king @pkeru @molds @zombie Pictures:

FORUMS | DISCORD | TWITTER Sunday: Fighting VR & Veng Ft. Turmoil Part 1: Violent Resolution We set up a short prep to battle against Violent Resolution this Sunday. Knowing the experience they have in that clan we knew we had to be ready for a tough battle. We massed up 22 Surgeons (Peaking at 25) and the battle began. We started east of bandit camp and were honestly dropping piles left and right forcing multiple clumps until about 10mins in Turmoil flew in on mains ruining the fun. We got a quick regroup and tellied to chaos altar and restarted. We got a few clumps dropping a handful of piles with some sick tanks at the start until about 5 mins in Turmoil crashed again. At this point we agreed on moving 1 last time when west of bandits where we got proly a solid 3 more minutes of action in before getting crashed again. At this point we decided to call it a day and plan for later. Although we fought for probably a total of 15Mins we still got some decent practice in with a new opponent & it was a change of pace for sure . Thanks for the action VR; til next time. Part 2: Vengeance We decided since our fight got hit 3 different times earlier we'd head out later tonight in hopes of getting some extra action and we weren't disappointed. During the mass we decided to ask a few clans if they were interested in a no prep quick scrap and the Vikings gladly accepted. We both massed up 20 men and headed up to Ghorrok to start the battle. If was I to say this wasn't one of our better performances against Veng i'd be lying. Clumps, DPS, Tanks, from our PoV were just crazy throughout this battle. We came in this fight ready to fuck shit up and we did exactly that. Again; all of our fights are usually close with Veng....so with that being said we know each clans is going to have their days of performing better then the other and I feel like today was just a day we were better overall. All in all its important for both of us to have clean consistent action and regardless to who does better or who technically gets the dub were both winning because were both fighting. Thanks for the action Veng; its always a pleasure. Violent Resolution Vengeance

Interested in joining the #1 Zerk/Tank/Med clan? Join Vengeance today at http://tastevengeance.com/forums/ With the 3 day weekend, the Vikings took the opportunity to clean out the wilderness. We began hopping around the caves searching for any action we could find. We ran through Skulled Revs a time or two but we were hard pressed to find any action in the rev caves. As the weekend progressed return fight against Resurgence. An extremely clean pkri (in multi-wilderness) with both teams clumping and moving through the map well. After a solid 20 mins of clean action we called for last pile and dropped the gf. The Vikings, still not satisfied, decided to return to the popular pk spots around the wild. We returned to the caves but could still only find Skulled Revs? With the caves being so slow, some Vikings wandered off into single-way combat. The change in style did matter as the Vikings stayed just as deadly. After filling their bags completely uncontested, the Vikings decided to call it a weekend and enjoy the holiday. #VENGUP

Discord: GxRMsvA | 'Wolves Den' CC Tuesday, June 3rd: On Tuesday Morning our spies informed us that Astronomy intended to crash a scheduled PKRI between RP & ZU. Having this intel, we got in contact with RP and offered to AC their fight. Fight #1 - Our first fight began at fog against Astronomy in a matched 30v30 fight. We quickly gained the upper-hand and pushed them into singles. Instead of celebrating our glorious victory over Astro, we rushed ZU, who were nearby and attempting an obvious 2v1 plot against Terror; however, ZU were unaware that their ally had fallen. We proceeded to explode ZU in under 60 seconds for a full clear. Poor coordination and communication lost you the 2v1, btw! Fight #2 - After humiliating Astro, they thought it would be funny to hit us in singles (down 10). Our superior 1v1 skills were no match for the inferior space cadet clan. Once their numbers were diminished, we ran onto Corp Hill in hopes of a multi-fight. Needless to say, Astro had no intention of fighting in multi. Fight #3 - As RP & ZU began their intended PKRI, we stood nearby, waiting for Astrology to crash. ZU, having a +8 opt advantage cleared RP relatively quickly. Now that RP was out of the picture, our deal for AC had expired. We took this opportunity to hit ZU. Within seconds Astro finally got the courage to show up, and once again the blatant 2v1'ing began. We dismantled both clans, eventually sending them to Clan Wars. 2v1 smoke sesh Astro ended for the second day in a row lmfao! ✞ Pinoyz ✞

Team Blitz massed up 6 tiradores and headed to the em rev caves. While at the caves we were taught Spanish by Venezuelans. We are now bilingual. Viva LA TEAM BLITZ

Team Blitz massed up 4 rioters in full black head to toe (peaked at 7). Headed to the rev caves and started lighting shit on shit on fire with flames of zamorak. Team Blitz looted gucci, louie, fendi, prada, chanel for ya girl, hermes for ya moms, and dior (rip pop smoke) for ya sister. #PureLivesMatter (PLM) After 2 hours of straight action we left the caves dripped the fuck out. ICEY GANG VVS ON THE NECK, BUSTDOWN ON THE WRIST, LOUIE ON THE DRAWS, GUCCI SOCKS ON THE BIG TOE, SHEEEESH.

nothing.

ZERG UNIT STOCKS IN STONKING RISE AS BUYERS RUSH TO CAPITALISE ON UNMISSABLE OPPORTUNITY. Best XLPC sees +10000% growth in stock price after slapping the fuck out of some clans down opts. READ ON IF YOU WANT TO MAKE MONEY. Watch 00:00 - 00:35 - Does your clan have a TeamSpeak as fun as ours? Probably not. That's why you should watch. Highlights Zerg Unit vs Envy 26 Zergs, down 6 against the 32 Envy bois, took to the trees west of Chaos Altar to dish out Snares, Scims, and Slaps. Despite the six man difference we held our own and brought the difference down to 2, ending with 20 Zergs to 22 Envy bois. Zerg Unit vs Astro Call us crazy, call us mad. Or call us what we are: fucking Billy Big Bollocks. We fought Astro down 11. Yes. Eleven. But who gives a fuck because we're all stuck indoors on a Saturday when we should be smashing straight 10/10 punani - we wanted action. Action exciting enough to make up for the lack of pussy sat on our faces. We started with 31, Astro with 42. We ended with 24 after XL crashed the fight, with Astro having 29 capes on the counter. Yeah we didn't win but we turned a deficient of 11 into 5 and if you can't see that quick math makes for an awesome fight fuck you. Zerg Unit vs Astro, Terror, Envy Cluster East of Corp Cave entrance there's a raised hill with some trees. In those trees Astro discovered what it means to have their tiny, pink, warty arseholes torn apart by the 12" kangaroo cock. We started with 30 Zergs to 32 Astros. Five minutes later there wasn't a team-6 cape in sight. Then Terror appeared. And Envy. Oh hello, boys. You want some of this kangaroo cock too? Our pleasure. The fight ebbed and flowed from Corp Hill to 18 ports to the weird hill between 18s and pond. We fought everywhere. We fucked everywhere. Unfortunately what we were fucking wasn't 10/10 blonde punani but snotty nosed virgins in blue and green capes. What a way to spend a Saturday. Wow. Zerg Unit vs Terror, Astro, Envy., Rampage Cluster Okay seriously, guys. Guys. Can we stop fighting at fucking level 5 wilderness? What are we? We're all adults here. We're all losing out on 10/10 punani (let's face it we'd all pull that top tier shit) by being sat indoors playing RuneScape. Can we at least make it fucking fun? Fighting at ditch isn't fun, it's fucking lame. Grow the fuck up and come fight us at GDZ. Anyway, we rushed the blue cape clan at 13s. They ran away. We chased them. We cycled bows and binds for a while before getting bored and setting off to hit someone more interesting. Little did we know that everyone would run to fucking level 4. Fuck you. Genuinely. You're all so fucking boring. Big thanks for the fights though. Nobody took pictures so you've been blessed with a very rushed text wall during my lunch break. And no, before you ask, I am not banging 10/10 punani this Monday either. Shame. At least I'm not wasting my time in level 4 wilderness though. Videos Join our Discord server: https://discord.gg/WqumDxd Idle in our CC: ‘ZergUnit’ Get a team-32 cape.

On this fine Saturday we massed up 48 Elite Shooters ready to take on the scene.. AND THAT'S WHAT WE DID @Brock POV @FLOWER POV @ASTRO SCOUTPOV

Team Blitz threw up the bat signal and massed up 4 hombres (peaking at 6). We uber pool our way up to the rev caves. Team Blitz did not back down to any challenges. Team Blitz Vs Supremacy Supremacy rushed south of rev cave and caught me lacking. Caught the boy with his pants down. I took the L like Jesus dying for my team's sin so they could live. Gf supremacy. Team Blitz Vs Zenith We logged on top of Zenith by accident and panicked. My whole team tele'd but I got tb'd. But I hit them with the filthiest crossover and dude flew out his climbing boots (Better rub some super restore on em ankles). I ran west and logged out. Gf zenith. (LMAO mans with the flip phone)

Discord: GxRMsvA | 'Wolves Den' CC Sunday, May 31st: Today was certainly an odd day, as most clans decided to cancel their trips. However, Terror showed up as usual amassing ~48 Space Wolves, who hopped on their respective space shuttles to destroy a certain pink clan. We had a total of three battles, all of which were convincingly won. The first fight was CATASTROPHIC and an easy win for the wolves. Subsequently, the 2nd and 3rd fights resulted in the butchering of Astrology, however Rampage bailed Astrology both times, preventing the Space Wolves to get a full clear. The blatant 2v1'ing could not be any more obvious (lmao). Anyhow, the end result was another successful weekend trip for Terror. Thanks to all xlpc pure clans on keeping tanks to a minimum. Let us strive to drop all tanks for clean, pure vs. pure action. ✞ Dreamz ✞ ✞ PINOYZ ✞

Discord: Nejerb | 'Wolves Den' CC Saturday, May 30th: Today the Terror wolves ventured into the wilderness with ~40 wolves later peaking at 42. Our trip was, without a doubt, action-packed with many multi-fights over the two hour duration. Clans appeared a little more reserved today, with Terror and Astro starting the majority of fights. Nonetheless, we were able to navigate our way for a successful Saturday PK. Thanks to all the pure clans for keeping tanks on the minimum. Let's preserve this scene for as long as we can. ✞ PINOYZ ✞

Molds POV Brock POV Pkeru POV Ramie POV

After a measly 56 hours of nonstop aggression from FOE, we finalized the last of our victims (Rage) and claim another GDZ Belt. Further proving FOE as the MOST unbreakable pure clan. RIP TO ALL THESE FALLEN RAGE SOLDERS, MOST OF THESE GUYS RAGGED FOR ONLY 45 MINUTES, WHICH IS CLEARLY NOT ENOUGH LMFAO. victimiser, strong bear, xu qilan-chi, broxx, typhi, t o n i XD, brockport, aiyah noob, sol ek sa, esofad, rumors, pile jordai, yen, santas hat, savrage, pooplord1235(not to be mistaken with pooplord 1234!), shaquee, ansha, king curtis, affair, snipenmurder, alb4nia, rag sets, chain is law, 2 man clump, solidtag, roadman int, parissg, barrage pile, matio_O, lumb m, stampee, zangw, oh so saucey, money phone, circles, all that, 9 tc, mennotoch, auguryzx, anthuhny, ngr bolter69, city of rage, cheetozpk, mother rage, join us, SE 17, faccetenara, stampee, 7eams, iross, mother vnzla