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50 Shades of 2011 - Coming to a Theatre Near You!


Murd
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Twas 2 weeks before Christmas, yes we all know, where EoP set off, to plunder our foe. With 55 peaking and multiple speaking, the Pirates of EoP controlled the weekend. Many tried taking our throne, but just ended up in withdrawing a loan, for all the mithril sets that they had to buy, in order to die and refill our supply.
bundle of twigsgotry aside, sh*t talking clans were pulverized.
 
 
Shout outs to Fi for holding the new world record of getting cleared in under .5 lmao
Thanks for the fights but damn, I thought all your mains and allies would make it harder for us. God damn you suck lmao
 
 
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[ Eruptiontube ]
 
 
 
[ Pixel Pigeon ]
 
 
 
 
 
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We heard as per usual Fi and Rd were working side by side, this time to try and defeat Zu. From our own experience being teamed on multiple times, we knew it was unfair so we decided to step in and teach these beta fgts a lesson. The screams of ponies echoed across the wilderness as green caped bronies were slapped silly and cleared off the map in what we thought was record timing (but alas, we had an even faster time recorded later on). With Fi rotting on the battlefield, we turned around onto Rd. Being abandoned by their masters and left for dead, they attempted to run laps around the area and beg for mercy. Didn't save them, they got sliced up.
 
 
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Found out after we had allowed cp to live from their miserable slump they had amassed enough invites to pull near 50, we thought they'd put up at least a fraction of a challenge. We rushed them at lava drags and they all either died or scattered in .5. We were going to follow them, until we heard rd/sko/zu were sitting around gap. We rushed from the north, slayed rd and sko, then located rd stragglers trying to run east to singles. We followed them, killed em 1 by 1 and let them taxi us to singles where we then decided to get a bank.
 
 
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The Fight of the Day
 
 
Heard that Zu and Rd were fighting at 26 hill and Rd were getting punished, so we knew Fi were going to be there soon to try bail them out. We walked around north of 26 hill in another world, and sure enough, found Fi crawling around at the black knights horseshoe thing. Seeing as Rd got dicked in under a minute, Fi were now sitting around clueless. We decided we'd allow our dogs to have some action, and rushed them in one of the most clean, 55v55 1v1's of the day.
 

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We started off with the momentum, pushed the dogs around the trees and horseshoe, the arrows were flying and scims blazing. There really wasn't any doubt we would win this fight, and we absolutely dominated them despite being camped by mains the whole fight. When Fi had 15~ left, Swelly made a dying motion for cp to try and bail them out. Unfortunately, we dipped out with 45 strong ending after pushing Fi minimaps away. It then turned out Fi's own dogs, Cp, turned on them and smacked the 15 or so Fi left because they were too damn slow. Shortly after, Swelly made it mandatory for every Fi member to purchase a treadmill so that in the future, they'd be capable of running away more than 20 meters before collapsing.
 
 
 

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Seeing as we are nice guys, we'll even put up Fi's POV which includes mains attacking Eop;

He reaches between my legs and pulls on the blue string – what?! – and gently takes my tampon out and tosses it into the nearby toilet. Holy fuck. Sweet mother of all … Jeez. And then he’s inside me … ah!
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Claiming a win, eh?
 
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Probably the most amusing fight of the day right here. We were hunting Fi and heard they lobbied out near dwarves so we walked up. Found Bv walking south west of dwarves near the lil tree/hill area so we rushed them and they dipped out pretty quickly after a small duking. Fatality, the so called "Pure Elites", then decided they'd try log in on top of us and gwas(?) us? I don't know, they must've had someone like Revan or one of their mains (hen-ry/elit3) leading it because it was one of the most disabled calls/movements I've seen for a while which left their members in chaos.
 
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We literally cleared them out in .5 seconds.
Fatality, the so called "Gods".
.5'd
.gif'd
I mean even Bv having 15~ less than us put up a better fight than that lmfao, that was just an embarrassment.
 
Their excuse for such a dreadful performance?
 
[sat][02:14:24 PM] <@[Fi]Couck> lol some scout messed up
[sat][02:14:28 PM] <@[Fi]Couck> we had 18
 
 
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Heard Rd and Sup were fighting near Ca, so we stalked our prey and waited for the bigger fish to come in. First Zu rushed in and my cuzzie James slayed peasants. We were about to rush in and hit whoever until we heard of another presence. A disturbance in the force, one we had not felt in a long, long time due to their slumping. We detected cp rushing in from singles with thier massed up army of sacrifices for us. They were literally too kind, we rushed in and cut them down within a few seconds. Losing nobody, we got a fall in on the hill west of 18s, as we knew hitting an inferior clan like cp would lure Fi out of their hiding place. 
 
We located Fi, rushed into them, pushed them around the wilderness and had them on the back foot most of the fight. Our dominance was clear with our remorseless piling. Maintaining 40+ for most of the fight, we were able to boost our kdr off Fi peasants and mains with ease. While we had Fi running to corp, we received word that our returners were being targeted near corp. We decided that since we had battered Fi so much that fight, we'd go help out our returners. Fi took this opportunity to dip out thinking they had accomplished something while returning in near 1 item gear.
 
With our returners now secured, we were disappointed to hear that Fi had lobbied as soon as they could. So we did the only respectable thing left to do, which was go hunt Rd for brown sticky stuffs and giggles. Found rd's slumping 25 man pull at 18s, killed them instantly.
 
 
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Also a warning to Redemption, you slumping peasants. If you're going to continue trying to threaten our members, you're going to regret it (this is directed towards Mr Royalty).
 
(01:05:30) <[RD]Shawn> canada.publicteamspeak.com
 
<01:06:07> "You know who it be" pokes you: every time you pm me something one of your members goes offline for an hour
<01:06:11> "You know who it be" pokes you: it begins now
<01:06:17> "You know who it be" disconnected (leaving)
 
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Want to join the #1 Pure Clan?
Join EoP Today,
where legends are born
www.eop-rs.com
#clan-eop
 

 

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