Guys, I am going to help u uneducated people out there understand the election in terms of RuneScape, via conversation. I feel it is a great way to help people learn by doing this.
Hilary Clinton and Bernie Sanders are democrats. They care about the level 3's. They want you to make a larger amount of money from chopping normal logs in Lumbridge, fishing shrimp, mining tin and copper ore. Why do these people fish shrimp? Cuz they too lazy to spend time leveling up in skill. The only down side to the presidential candidates' plan is that it will fuck everything up for merchers.
Donald Trump is a Republican. This means that he wants to take good care of the rich. This means if you spend all day farming God Wars, and you have a fat ass bank, he gon' make sure that bank stays big, and that we don't decrease the price in drops you get. He likes the fact you have 99 fishing for sharks, and for that, he will keep them at a nice high stable rate. However, Donald Trump feels RuneScape isn't secure. He feels like there are too many new players with the release of Free to Play, causing a growth in people who don't care about RuneScape and like to troll and scam and fuck brown sticky stuff up for us, and has decided that he will make it only members again. Most people love this, as it will keep the community smaller, and more tight knit and friendly, where as all the new players will hate this and call him racist since he doesn't let more new people like them join the game and it won't let them keep playing since it will be members only, so they will have to go back to whatever games they used to play. His plan: Add a ddos protective Wall to the runescape home page, a wall so big, that no ddosers can attack when they get angry that they don't become a member. All he asks is they sign up and become a member, and they can join RuneScape. Without membership, RuneScape would die, and he doesn't want RuneScape to die for all the people that play the game. Also, other gamers look at RuneScape and think it's full of pussies. Donald Trump is a RuneScape player that stands up for why RuneScape is sick, and makes great comebacks that put other games in their places and makes them understand we are alpha to them and can beat them in any debate or physical fight.
Hilary Clinton is a Jagex moderator. She is a very big part of the RuneScape community as she is big and famous. Everyone knows who she is, her daddy was a moderator, so they let he be one too. The problem is, rather than keeping confidential information within the moderator/maker circle of RuneScape headquarters, she felt she should text her fam all the glitches, and things wrong with RuneScape, keeping them well informed with unpatched scams. When she got caught for leaking glitches and scams, she didn't get banned even though alot of people felt she should get banned. She says that she didn't think it mattered that she gave her fam all the best lure scripts and bot programs she has found out about over the years, because she trusts them cuz they her fam (daddy fucked in white house??? ).
Bernie sanders is a veteran of Runescape. Pretty old player, and he wants RuneScape to become something awesome. RuneScape currently has great protection for players. They just added an authenticator which even furthers our defense aggainst hackers. Bernie Sanders wants to trash the whole authenticator thing, get rid of passwords, and add something new. He hasn't really made clear what, but he wants to trash it all. Start over. He started a thread about this and people asked where the money would come from. He said they could start an in-game charity where everyone puts money in the charity well to raise higher taxes, but everyone was confused with how he would come up with billions of dollars if most banks were about 1 mil and because the Republicans who have the biggest banks don't give care for his democratic plans. He said he had plans but nothing on paper. He also likes the support of the poor players, since most people are poor giving him more voters. Also, because his plans all sound great, like making RuneScape free for a month, but he doesn't have any clear plans how to do this, but they all seem to spam in varrock "feel the bern." Most of them get muted for auto-chats.
We got another story for you guys today, this is quite a disturbing one but lets get straight into it.
One of our reporters was browsing the http://sharkbrew.com when he came across a disturbing status update of [EoP-Applicant]Victory
We didn't believe it at first, but after close investigation it really does say '//wrists'.
Does this mean [EoP-Applicant]Victory is cutting himself? We have tried to contact @@Victory for some answers on why he posted this disturbing message.
He has not replied to any of those yet, we're currently asking CP ( @@messi ) if they know anything about this but it seems like aren't aware of the fact he was suicidal either.
Lets hope current EoP applicant victory will get some professional medical help. I hope you guys will send him your support, its truly hard to see somebody within our community going through this insane depression.
Childline (0800 1111) runs a helpline for children and young people in the UK. Calls are free and the number won't show up on your phone bill.
In other news, we're still working on the lost TLP leader story, bare with us while we're working on it!
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